Nepali Times
Long live Joketantra


What do Nepal and Naples have in common besides the fact that every year the postal service mis-directs thousands of letters with Nepali addressees to Napoli?

Rubbish. Yes, residents on the outskirts of Naples have stopped taking any more of the city's trash until the municipality provides them with adequate compensation. They have been burning tyres on the streets of Naples, and garbage is piling up in the tourist area. What a relief to know that they have the same problems with waste management in Italy as we have in the Kathmandu Metropolitan City.


Comrade Awesome keeps comparing himself to Gautam Buddha. The Maoist HQ is in Buddha Nagar, the central committee meeting this week is being held at a resort in Namo Baudha and there is actually a commander with the nom de guerre of 'Comrade Siddhartha'. What\'s with the Buddha obsession, comrades?

We don't know if PKD brought up the matter of the eight-fold path at the Maoist central committee meeting in Kabhre this week since it was being held behind closed doors, but we are informed on good authority that he suddenly got up, looked at his watch and said: "Whoa! Completely forgot. Gotta go."

So, with Comrade Laldhoj in hot pursuit, Fearsomeness skipped the centcom to attend a Marwari Family invitation to deliver a speech. The interesting thing here is not that a Maoist leader deigned it important enough to leave a critical party meeting to attend a function organised by Nepal's premier business community, but what he told the Marwari businessmen: "The YCL can be mobilised to control the growing insecurity, extortion and abductions suffered by business sector." Do we smell a deal here?

Forever the optimist, the Ass takes all this positively. The rise in YCL extortion nationwide in the past week is the surest sign yet that the Maoists are putting together a war chest and therefore are serious about elections. Om mani padme hum.


However, over at Baluwatar, there is no sign of urgency in declaring a poll date. Even on Thursday, the cabinet postponed the decision. Last week GPK said one week, this week he is saying next week. The reason for the delay is that Girjau has suddenly decided to make his daughter minister. Frau Jost really wanted the Foreign Minister\'s job, but apparently had to settle for minister without portfolio. Which means what, she gets to interfere with all other ministries?

This must be an indication that the First Daughter has a leg up on First Cousin Shekhar and Sitaula Baje. There have been signs of Sujata Auntie having a greater say in matters of state these days. The other day she managed to get the whole Reporter\'s Club to come to Baluwatar to meet the prime minister. If Mohamad (PBUH) can\'t go to the mountain, the mountain (Rishi Dhamala) can always come to Mohamad.

It was at that press meet that Girjabau endorsed what General Ajay P Nath had told the press before he went off to China that army integration was a bad idea. Why should the First Daughter be orchestrating all this if she doesn\'t agree with it? Rightwing kangresis are now as dangerous to the peace process as the baddies.


Trouble is that the prime minister is torn between keeping happy the First Nephew (who is Sitaula Baje's chum) while not hurting the First Daughter's feelings. How the prime minister sorts this one out is going to have a greater bearing on this country's future than the unity of the seven party alliance.


But true to the South Asian tradition of anointing offspring as heir apparents (look at Bilawal Bhutto sweating it out this week at a presscon in London), Girjau probably wouldn't mind if Sujata Ma'm succeeded him. Is that why he told kangresi wimmin cadre last week that it was time Nepal had a female prime minister?


(11 JAN 2013 - 17 JAN 2013)