Politics as entertainment only got better last week as the lunatic fringe went through convulsions, mutiny and high profile splits. Mohan Baidya’s CPN Revolutionary Maoists, a near forgotten entity that considers elections to be a capitalist trick, was torn asunder as Comrade Badal (Cloud) jumped ship amid cries of revisionism and treason.
In the past your scribe wondered why the press bothers with such ridiculous parties with so little support but now feels grateful for the comic relief. There aren’t many countries on earth that still feature communist factions battling it out in epic sagas of betrayal and power-lust.
As Comrade Cloud’s faction went through the motions of setting up a new party Prachanda (Awesome) was waiting with open arms, promising high level posts and dowry galore back in the mother of all Maoist parties. It felt like being privy to the mating rituals of an exotic, endangered species as Awesome and Cloud were reunited, the stuff of Kollywood, and in the heat of the moment the looniest tune of them all, Matrika Yadav and his band of Marxists (Feverish) joined the unity parade.
The sight of grown men sporting teen-age nicknames, puffed up with self-importance as they debate the finer points of a discredited ideology, is as good as it gets these days and would be even funnier if the whole song and dance wasn’t a ruse.
It’s surely no coincidence this sudden push for Maoist unity comes at a time when thousands of complaints on war-era crimes are being registered with the TRC. Perhaps the real reason for this newfound fraternity among communists, who normally squabble for a living, is the fear of prosecution, with the promise of impunity held out to all who join.
Prachanda’s recent pleas to ‘come home’ were rebuffed by Baburam Bhattarai (BRB), who, in his new avatar as Capitalist Roader, declared it was time to ‘polarise instead of unify’ as he desperately tries to leave his past behind. In what sounded like an admission of guilt, Prachanda retorted that BRB can’t escape responsibility for conducting the war ‘that caused suffering’ just because he ‘joined hands with the bourgeoisie’.
If your correspondent could make this stuff up he’d be working overtime in Bollywood. The action continued apace as Prachanda got slapped with a contempt of court charge last week, citing his statements at a recent program called ‘People’s War and Court Verdicts’, (which just goes to show what’s on his mind these days). According to the charge sheet the accused showed contempt of court by saying the judiciary was involved in ‘conspiracy’ and ‘tried to create night in daytime’, while boldly declaring he’d never abide by the court’s verdict.