<figure><img src="https://superdesk-pro-c.s3.amazonaws.com/sd-nepalitimes/20221114101116/6372083c9c7e80680e0b54d7jpeg.jpg" alt="" width="1274" height="904"/><figcaption>Illustration: DIWAKAR CHETTRI</figcaption></figure>However much we love our country, there comes a time when we have to take the bull by its horns or, as they say in the trade, hoist ourselves up by our own petard.Since space is a bit limited this week due to commercial encroachment, let's not waste too much time beating needlessly around the bush, since a bird in the hand is worth two in the aforementioned bush, both of which we can kill with one stone at an opportune moment. So, without further ado, more to-ing and fro-ing, weighing pro’s and con’s, allow me to hand the floor to the Chair to list ten reasons why we think we should all get the hell out of here:1 Nepal’s population has crossed 29 million, our food and fuel imports are rising exponentially, foreign exchange reserves can only pay for six months of imports. It is therefore every Nepali’s patriotic duty to do his/her/its part not to be a further burden on the Motherland. The last one to leave please turn off the light.2 This is the year with elections for all three levels of government. So, let us vote with our feet.3 The latest Corruption Perception Index released by Transparency International shows that Nepal’s ranking is stuck at #117 in the list of countries deemed to be most corrupt. This means that despite ample opportunities for malfeasance during the Covid-19 crisis, and utmost efforts by the country’s bureaucracy, politicians, industrialists to foster a culture of bribery, Nepal is still exactly where it was last year in the Corruption Index, while aggressive neighbours like Bangladesh and Afghanistan have become more corrupt by leaps and bounds. There is no future in a country that cannot even bribe its way to the top of the corruption rankings.4 Ten years ago, this country’s top economists had confidently predicted that by the end of the decade Nepal would be a ‘failed state’. We have failed to achieve that goal. Instead, Nepal is preparing to graduate to Middle Income Status by 2025. If we cannot even be declared a failed state, it is futile to waste time hanging around to wait for it to happen.5 The government is making it impossible for illegal sand miners, limestone quarry contractors, cement tycoons and willful defaulters to earn a decent living and flaunt our wealth. We are not even allowed to adulterate honey anymore. How can we live in a country that does not respect risk-taking and entrepreneurship to take someone else’s money and run?6 There are no more idols left to steal anymore, so why hang around?7 There is too much petty corruption, but not enough major payoffs, profiteering and breach of trust on large infrastructure projects to make it worthwhile to do business in Nepal anymore.8 The new Media Code of Ethics does not even allow journalists to accept free lunches and envelopes.9 To take a nice hot bath.10 You gotta go if you gotta go.

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10 reasons to leave Nepal

<figure><img src="https://superdesk-pro-c.s3.amazonaws.com/sd-nepalitimes/2022111410118/637205ab9c7e80680e0b28ccjpeg.jpg" alt="" width="1500" height="1000"/><figcaption></figcaption></figure>One of the benefits of the current pandemic is that it has institutionalised the “Namaste” as a greeting not just in the Subcontinent but all over the world. Here in Nepal, the Namastay has once and for all done away with those awkward moments when, upon meeting female farangs, natives had to decide at the spur of the moment whether they should peck them on the cheek, or just shake hands.However, is it one peck on one of two cheeks (left one, or right one first?), is it two pecks on one cheek each, or is it going to be three pecks on two alternate cheeks? It was a minefield out there. And what made it even trickier was that these decisions had to be taken within a split second. A slight miscalculation, and things could take an embarrassing turn and create a diplomatic incident.During pre-Covid days a couple of centuries ago, the Ass once made a complete ass of himself when he tried to land two pecks on the cheeks of the Mexican Ambassador who was expecting only one, and ended up smooching her nostril.With Covid, all these humiliating faux pas are now a thing of the past. You just namastay folks from a distance of 3 metres with double masks on, and that’s that. None of that messy canoodling, and exchange of virus-laden droplets.On this matter, our ancients were way ahead of their time. When Prof Vatsayana published his bestseller, the Kama Sutra, he already knew through the grapevine that kissing was unhygienic. Which is why while depicting many imaginative positions for carnal wrestling in his anthology of sex, he never included the actual act of osculation.Some of the extreme acrobatic moves in his catalogue are now to be found depicted in carvings on the struts and eaves of Kathmandu Valley temples, but in none of them are the protagonists actually administering mouth-to-mouth resuscitation to each other. And that fellow doing doggie style is actually demonstrating the Heimlich Manoeuvre. Jeez, such dirty minds.It is the realisation about just how unsanitary this filthy habit is that to this day, the Board of Film Censors of India has banned kissing in Bollywood movies. Paying lip service is strictly outlawed, but the censors have no problems at all with tongue lashing.And since Nepali cinema copies Bollywood, kissing is frowned upon here too. (Although kissing ass is perfectly acceptable in both cultures.)And that is why modern acolytes of Prof Vatsayana were so aroused when Richard Gere planted kisses on Shilpa Shetty. Even Nelson Mandela could not control himself and smooched Shabana Azmi on stage. It is clear that some foreigners think they can take liberties with Subcontinental womanhood with such unbecoming behaviour.This reminds me: we have to double the number of personal bodyguards assigned to President Bidya Devi Bhandari next time she is off on a state visit somewhere. Never know which lecherous celebrity lurking out there is just waiting for an unguarded moment to make his move.

A tongue lashing

<figure><img src="https://superdesk-pro-c.s3.amazonaws.com/sd-nepalitimes/20221110141132/636cfdbe9c7e80680e0a0c00jpeg.jpg" alt="" width="1500" height="1000"/><figcaption></figcaption></figure>It doesn’t look like anyone is about to give Prime Minister Brave Lion a honeymoon period. The same folks who were baying for Oli’s blood are now sinking their fangs into the lion’s jugular. And it’s not even 100 days yet.That is very unfair, give the man some time. He has been a prime monster five times before. He knows what he’s doing. He is in no hurry to expand the cabinet because the country seems to run just fine with only four ministers. The longer he can delay adding ministers, the less headaches he has, and the more money the country saves.The Ass just did some back of the envelope calculations, and it seems Nepal’s exchequer has saved 1 Kharab 5 Arabs 31 Corrodes and 47.5 Lacks just in the past 6 weeks by not having to pay for a jumbo prawn size cabinet. We have salvaged on honorariums for all those new honorary ministers, salaries for their brothers-in-law to serve as PAs, on allowances for a Armed Police Farce platoon for every minister, SUVs, smartphones, Dasain bonuses.These savings will add up to so much that they will wipe out Nepal’s burgeoning budget deficit. This is Prime Minister Dubya’s masterstroke to save the economy from collapse. It looks like we do not really need a budget debate in this prorogued parliament after all because we have no balance of payment deficit anymore for the opposition to bash the government about.A skeleton cabinet also means there is less corruption. Imagine all the kickbacks not partaken of, the bribes uncollected, the commissions not handed over under the table. This means the treasury has healthy cash flow so we can send ex-prime ministers for health checkups to Delhi.But now that the Unified Marxist-Leninists are not unified anymore, Brave Lion will have more mouths to feed in the new cabinet. That can easily be resolved, what is more worrying is what we are going to call all these new communist parties — they are splitting like amoebas in heat.It used to be pretty straight forward in the old days, there was just one Communist Party of Nepal (CPN). But then there came the CPN (Mashal) and CPN (Masal) — yes, they were different parties. After that, there were the CPN (Marxist-Leninist) and CPN (Marxist-Leninist-Maoist) which merged with the others to form what we now know as the CPN (Unified Marxist-Leninist). The CPN (Maoists) got so sick of it all that they preferred to go underground and shoot everyone.But now with Makunay registering the CPN (UML-Socialist) he has opened a pandora’s box. Does this mean that the other CPNs are not socialist? If so, what does this mean for dialectic materialism and the dictatorship of the proletariat?And since the comrades seem to be suffering from ideological promiscuity, we have to make space for more communist parties in the days to come:UML (Socialite)CPN (Marxism-Leninism-Hinduism)CPN (Maoist-Monarchist)NCP (Big Plop)CPN (Revolutionary)CPN (Revolting)CPN (Asinine)

The Ass

CPN (Asinine)

<figure><img src="https://superdesk-pro-c.s3.amazonaws.com/sd-nepalitimes/20221110141124/636cfc3c9c7e80680e0a0b79jpeg.jpg" alt="" width="1500" height="1000"/><figcaption></figcaption></figure>Coalition politics brings out the best in a democracy. The five-party anti-Oli alliance has been in grabberment for less than a month and it already has a three-member Cabinet. That is quite an achievement, and confirmation that Prime Minister Dubya adheres strongly to the Common Minimum Program by having the minimum number of ministers.However, Parkinson’s Law will sooner or later manifest itself and the Cabinet’s workload will expand to fill the time allotted to it. How will the wealth ever get spread around with such a small Cabinet? The PM will have to be prepared to expand his Cabinet for stability and prosperity (of ministers).With five parties in the governing coalition, including a disgruntled faction, it will be a challenge to ensure a division (if not multiplication) of the spoils. It will not have only three full ministers, one minister of state, and a couple of others lying in state.It is a shame that for a country with so much potential and kinetic energy, the government is so critically understaffed. GONe has to be an equal opportunity employer that believes in levelling the playing field by giving every citizen a chance to hit the jackpot.The PM needs to be more decisive to immediately deploy an army of ministers, not just the pathetic squad he has right now. It is a skeleton Cabinet with skeletons in its closet.We also need more ministers because that will kick-start the economy after the pandemic slowdown, and have an immediate downstream impact on the labour market. A larger council of ministers will have a multiplier effect by unleashing Nepal by creating more jobs in the civil service, manufacturing, and the service industry.Every new minister will need a 15-member security detail, personal assistant, valet, peons, cook, driver, chamchas, power brokers, gundas, extortionists, and wives. Every new member of the Cabinet will also be transacting with quarry contractors, sand mining mafia, and medical school tycoons. Besides jobs, each minister will also need a new SUV, half a dozen pickups for bodyguards, a new sofa set with mini bar and attached bathroom, towels to drape on their chairs, and a large closet to store skeletons in.That is just one minister. With the constitutionally-mandated size of the Cabinet, multiply all that by 25 and imagine the effect on the economy. It will create thousands of new jobs, and increase Nepal’s per capita GDP so we can attain middle-income status ahead of schedule.Having been PM five times previously, Dubya has plenty of experience with splitting ministries to appease coalition partners. For example, the Ministry of Civil Aviation, Tourism and Culture can be divided into The Ministry of Civil, Ministry of Aviation, Ministry of Tourism and Nepotism, and the Ministry of Vermiculture.The Ministry of Women, Children and Senior Citizens can also be split into the Ministry of Married Women, Ministry of Unmarried Women, Ministry of Singleforeverwomen, Ministry of Teenagers, the Adolescent Ministry, Ministry of Infants and Babies and the Ministry of Wild Asses.

Skeletons in the Cabinet

<figure><img src="https://superdesk-pro-c.s3.amazonaws.com/sd-nepalitimes/20221110151120/636d09149c7e80680e0a6056jpeg.jpg" alt="" width="1500" height="1000"/><figcaption></figcaption></figure>Nepal is serious about democracy, and that is why we have to keep restoring it every decade or so because we believe in government for the people, by the people, and for the people in government.We also put our faith in reincarnation, and that explains the pressure from some quarters to put the resurrection of the monarchy to a referendum vote, and await His Majesty’s Second Coming.It is a sign of a well-functioning and mature democracy that parliamentary affairs are run by committees. When a dispute cannot be settled without comrades coming to blows, they set up a Special Committee which immediately forms a Sub-Committee to address grievances, and which decides to form a Task Force that will oversee a Working Group made up of members of an Expert Panel.This being Nepal, even the membership of the Special Committee will be challenged in the Supreme Court, and that is when they will have to establish a Dispute Resolution Caucus made up of Caucasian males.And when there is a dispute in the Dispute Resolution Caucus, Nepal’s leaders can fall back on extra-Constitutional means to resolve ego clashes and malcontent members ticked off because they did not get to be made Minister of Midwifery and Animal Husbandry as a reward for helping topple the previous regime.And that is exactly what Prime Minister Dubya has gone and done. To balance both disgruntled and gruntled factions of the five-party alliance, he has constituted a three-member High-level Political Mechanism to decide who gets to be minister of what.This Unholy Trinity is made up of individuals who think they should be in power but aren't. PKD was PM twice, and sorely misses it. MKN is still grumpy even though he toppled KPO. And SBD has found out that one can be prime minister five times in this country even if one loses an election.Maybe we do need new mechanics to fix this mechanism called Nepal. Could it be that the three leaders are so high-level that they need supplemental oxygen just to climb up the stairs at Paris Danda? Soon, there is going to be a power struggle about who is the highest among the high-level members of the Mechanism, the Grand Ayatollah of the Mechanists.Our best bet may be to set up a Not-so-high-level Non-political Mechanism (NSHLNPM) to appoint ministers by lottery to a Jumbo Cabinet. We are on the right track, though, going by making the owner of a hospital chain the Health Technocrat. In the same manner, the Educationist Minister should be none other than the Chair of PABSON, the Hydropowerful Minister can be the CEO of IPPAN, the Physical Infrastructure Minister should go to the Chairperson of the Federation of Tipper Truck Owners of Nepal.Nepal’s problems are so intractable that thank goodness we have a fall back option: an Even-Higher-Level Political Mechanism that includes India, China and the G7.

Hi-Level Mechanism

As a Backside columnist, it falls upon this scribe’s lap to urge readers to look at the bright side, stay bullish, be a beacon of hope, and believe that without dark clouds there is no possibility of having a silver lining.Thanks to this unhealthy emergency, we can finally stop worrying about all the corruption, political incompetence, instability, selfishness, greed, wildfires, air pollution, Nepal’s widening trade gap, and the state of disrepair on the Godavari Road. There are now much more serious things to worry about.My fellow-communist columnists are all complaining that the grumblement did this and did that, but did nothing to control the Covid pandemonium. That is unkind. Given the kind of blunders Nepal’s rulers are prone to making, it is good that they have learnt from their mistakes, and have taken a vow of silence and not lifted a finger against the virus. Imagine if they were left to their own devices to make more asinine rules and award more contracts for PCR and vaccine imports to try to fight the virus. There would be chaos.The problem with this country is not that we have a government that does nothing, the problem is that opinion-makers want it to do something, anything. Which is why it is good that Prime Minister Ali is not listening to them. If the grovelment is going to make bold decisions like banning all outbound flights except to the one neighbouring country beginning with the letter ‘I’ that is going through the world’s worst Covid crisis, it is better it does nothing.Historically, the time-tested method of Nepal’s leaders when faced with a crisis is to play dead, and not make any hasty decisions until it is too late. The idea is to ignore the problem, pretend it does not exist — that way there is no urgent necessity to actually do anything. GONE has to learn to live up to its acronym.Nevertheless, given the seriousness of the pandemic, Nepal’s leaders are setting a good example by promoting hand-washing. This is working brilliantly because they have washed their hands off dealing with the pandemonic.Nepal also takes self-isolation very seriously. The best thing we have done is to be asked to be left alone by the international community in this crisis, and that is why we have not lobbied to be on the list of countries that the US is shipping AZ vaccines to, spurned Sputnik, played hard-to-get with the Chinese, and we did not take part in Joe Biden’s Climate Summit for fear that we would actually have to show something we have done to save the planet. All this means that we have cleverly  kept Indian, Chinese and Russian jabs at arm’s length.Now that we have Lockdown downtime each of us has to look at all the things we have to get used to during this incarceration:<ol> 	<li>Gentlemen can grow that hip pony-tail that they always wanted to have. The Ass already has a tail, so this does not apply to me.</li> 	<li>Stop shaving, save on expensive razor refills and foam.</li> 	<li>No need for deodorants, your armpits can be as smelly as you want.</li> 	<li>Ladies can hang around bra-less around the house.</li> 	<li>Gentlemen can attend zoom meetings in shirt, tie and undies.</li> 	<li>Wear masks at all times since you don’t have to smile and put on a brave face.</li> 	<li>When flights resume, Kathmandu Airport will replace frisking arriving passengers with antibody searches so as to stop the virus before it enters Nepali air space.</li></ol>Read also: <a href="https://www.nepalitimes.com/opinion/zoomed-out/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Zoomed out</a>, Ass<a style="font-size: 15px; letter-spacing: 0.01em;" href="https://www.nepalitimes.com/opinion/why-wear-a-mask/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Why wear a mask?</a>, Ass

Lockdown downtime

It is beginning to worry us in the journalism profession that the press gets bad press. Without beating the bush around, it would be fair to assert that in certain quarters the media has, ummm, a public relations problem. Or to put it more politely: people hate our guts.Even if we live in an age of alternative truth, it is factually incorrect to call us presstitutes, or to state that we are self-important mercenaries, holier-than-thou hypocrites, annoyingly preachy, morally repugnant nosey parkers, arrogant hacks who hunt in packs, and smug skunks. Actually, we are much worse. And if you have any problems with that, well, tough luck.Blaming the messenger is not new. The Right Honourable Genghis Khan was known for his draconian Media Council Bill which allowed his junta to legally hang reporters up by their own petard at strategic points along the Belt Roadway to Kashgar.We have, of course, moved away from such crude and ruthless methods of controlling information. Today, our rulers are governed by international covenants such as the Universal Declaration of Humane Rights and its Article 11 which states, inter alia: ‘Every citizen has the right to freedom of expression, but no freedom after expression. Citizens can propagate and believe in fake news without let or hindrance and regardless of class, caste or creed. Media has the inalienable right to impart gossip, innuendo and cat videos to an unsuspecting public.’Modern newspersons today exercise much greater self-confidence, self-esteem and self-censorship. The Ministry of Dictation and Doublespeak has made it abundantly crystal-clear that journalists must report verbatim on official pronouncements, even when they bend the truth a bit.This rule will henceforth be strictly enforced so that if any domestic or international hack is caught red-handed spreading the truth during a national crisis, they could have their Media License revoked. The Minister of Misinformation and Communicable Diseases now requires journalists to acquire a license to lie, which must be renewed every calendar year after passing a written exam.They will have the option of applying for a Smart License, for which there will be tougher questions like: ‘Do editors have a heart? If so, prove it.”Journalists can also opt for a Not-So-Smart License, which allows reporters special privileges like writing under the influence of the ruling party.Interns can avail themselves of a Learner’s License that allows them to learn on-the-job to make things up.

License to lie

The news that China has closed the border and denied transit visas to 10,000 mountain goats and sheep from Tibet to enter the Feral Republic of Nepal this year has been greeted with dismay in some quarters. This is understandable given the irreversible setback this will create for national efforts to celebrate Nepal’s national festival with the gusto it deserves.As we all know, goats from the northern and southern neighbours have sacrificed their lives to safeguard Nepal’s martial tradition that allowed us to fight off invaders and preserve our independence throughout history.Fried goat guts washed down with beer are an important guarantee of inertness over the coming weeks, and without adequate ungulate supplies Nepalis may actually end up doing something useful and important in the national interest.This is why the semi-government National Institute for Lethargy and Inertia has moved swiftly to identify alternate sources of goat protein so that there is sufficient indolence and lassitude to go around this Dasain. Even so, we need special Vigilance Squads to patrol the corridors of power to carry out spot checks to make sure that no civil servants and politicians are sneaking into their offices to actually get some work done during Dasain. (If they are sneaking to their parliamentary chambers to indulge in other hanky pankies, that is fine.)Senior ministers, secretaries, MPs, and ambassadors plenipotentiaries are not exempt from this crackdown. It has come to our notice, for instance, that the Home-away-from-Home Minister and the Health Hazard Minister are both busy catching up with a backlog of pending work in their official quarters. They were spotted during their commutes poring over piles of files. They will get a severe reprimand from the Crime Minister for spoiling ruling party unity by being workaholics.Unless all members of the cabinet show strict discipline and consensus, the Chief Whip will be compelled to give them all a tongue-lashing for working overtime. And it will not just be lip service, you can be sure of that. Woe on such spoilsports, they hamper our efforts to bring the country to a standstill.It’s not that we are less lazy the rest of the year, but Dasain is when we can really wallow in sloth. Even though we know this, we sometimes lapse into exertion and toil. Vigilance, that is what is required. Vigilance against hard work. We have always underestimated the role laziness plays in non-violence and in ending wars. Making people too lazy to gouge the opposition with beer bottles should be the aim of all peace-building endeavours.Having said that, it has just come to my notice that I am now too lazy to complete this column. May you all attain nirvana this Dasain: that state of perfect immobility and bliss.

Dasain Go-Slow

Since it doesn’t have anything better to do, GONe has gone and sent an expedition to find out exactly how high Mt Everest is, despite our strong protests. Why did our grapplement have to be such a smart ass, anyways? What if the bastard is indeed knocked off, and Everest is shorter than previously thought? Imagine what that would do to our national morale, our territorial integrity and our gastroenterology as a nation if Chomolungma is no longer the Goddess Mother of the Earth, but only an Aunt?Nepal may as well commit national hara-kiri if Mt Everest is no longer the highest peak in the world. It is an unthinkable, nightmarish scenario. For one thing, what will become of all the products that are named Everest this or Everest that? Everest Bank will have to change its slogan to ‘Our Interest Rates Are Second Highest’. Everest Hotel will no longer be ‘Nepal’s Top Hotel’. Nepal Tourism Board may have to alter all its posters to say ‘Nepal: The Land of Everest. We Were Greatest Once.’ And 8848 Vodka will have to alter its bottle labels to 8488.Expedition members are now back busily crunching numbers, and will announce their findings in the next fiscal year. This leaves us enough time to cook the data, or if need be, allocate a few arabs and corrodes to ensure that the mountain maintains its stature as the highest on the planet in order to protect our fragile national ego.It is in our ultra-nationalist interest to come up with a cunning plan to retain Everest’s stature. There are now so many climbers who want to get to the top that GONe should make it mandatory for every climber not just to pay $11,000 each in royalty, but to carry 20kg of rocks from Base Camp and deposit it at the top. If my calculations serve me right, this year alone we could have added another 12m to the summit height if all climbers and guides did their bit. For this we can elicit the help of expeditions from the Chinese side, since their reputation would also be tarnished if Everest is found to have shrunk.GONe should double the number of permits, and instead of bringing down trash from the mountain as currently stipulated, climbers would have to take all the oxygen cylinders and uneaten noodle packs, and deposit them at the summit.If we do that, my back of the envelope math shows Everest’s height will cross 9,000m above mean sea level by 2025. This means the mountain will be even more popular, and to handle the bigger numbers of climbers, GONe may have to install a funicular up the Icefall, moving walkways across the Western Cwm, a cable car to the South Col, and an escalator from there to the View Tower Restaurant &amp; Bar at the summit.

Future of Mt Everest

Nepal’s only international aviation gateway, at Kathmandu airport, will cut night-time operation hours to allow construction of taxiways, and airlines have been told to curtail flights. This is expected to lead to more than normal chaos during the height of peak autumn and spring tourist seasons at an airport that is congested even at the best of times. The airport will close from 10PM to 8AM from 8 November-31 March 2025. The taxiways will now connect to the thresholds at both ends of the runway, making the airport more efficient in handling higher frequencies of landings and takeoffs. The parallel taxiway extension will allow international flights to land every 4 minutes instead of the current every 7 minutes. At present planes have to wait to land until a plane taking off backtracks along the runway.&nbsp; Kathmandu is Nepal’s only airport with international operations, and it has only one runway that is only one way in from the south over the mountains. With the taxiway improvement, the airport will be able to handle 42 aircraft landings and takeoffs per hour — double the current capacity.&nbsp; The Civil Aviation Authority of Nepal (CAAN) has been trying to entice international airlines to also start flying to and from the other two international airports at Pokhara and Bhairawa (Lumbini) by slashing landing and handling charges. But so far only Nepal Airlines operates a weekly flight to Bhairawa from Kuala Lumpur.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20241018161016_046569e53d1d66cd445cc66c697c0ef724810aec9f54bdf827481e3cd6b80c32.jpg" data-media-id="editor_0" data-image-id="20241018161016_046569e53d1d66cd445cc66c697c0ef724810aec9f54bdf827481e3cd6b80c32" data-rendition-name="original" width="2356" height="1134" loading="lazy" alt="Kathmandu airport expansion"> <figcaption>Kathmandu Airport Expansion plan with extension of taxiways to the thresholds of runways 02 and 20 that will limit airport operations from 8 November 2024 - 31 March 2025. Areas in blue are existing structures, including the international terminal which in future will be the domestic airport, and the new international terminal near the north end of the runway,</figcaption> </figure>   <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20241018121028_6e17cc2ee87c1b02d78cb54905825b7aa15299b7a00f5eddb01a59579ab85c1a.jpg" data-media-id="editor_1" data-image-id="20241018121028_6e17cc2ee87c1b02d78cb54905825b7aa15299b7a00f5eddb01a59579ab85c1a" data-rendition-name="original" width="1353" height="1328" loading="lazy" alt="Kathmandu airport NT"> </figure>  CAAN has reportedly told international airlines to cut their flight frequency to Kathmandu citing the shorter operation hours and has told budget airlines to shift some of their flights to Pokhara or Bhairawa, or face cuts. Many airlines currently operate regular flights to and from Kathmandu between 10PM and 8AM: Air Arabia to Sharjah, Fly Dubai to Dubai, Jazeera Airways to Kuwait, Cathay Pacific to Hong Kong, Singapore Airlines, several Nepal Airlines flights, and one of four daily flights by Qatar Airways to Doha. Jazeera Airways, FlyDubai, and Thai AirAsia have applied and got permission from CAAN to begin regular flights to Bhairawa’s Gautam Buddha International Airport. Starting 9 November, FlyDubai will start making a stopover in Bhairawa before flying on to Kathmandu. Immigration, customs and security are all fully functional in Bhairawa. In Kathmandu, the next phase of the airport upgrade includes converting the current international terminal for domestic operations, the construction of a new international terminal where the domestic departure area is now, as well as moving the hangars and the Nepal Army Air Wing to the eastern side of the runway. The apron area will also double its parking space for widebody jets. This is part of a Airport Capacity Enhancement Project that was initially funded through a $80 million loan from the Asian Development Bank (ADB), and the entire masterplan is expected to cost $800 million. This project is the latest upgrade to Nepal’s only international airport since it saw its first flight in 1949. The current international and domestic terminals are too small to handle the current annual traffic volume of 8.5 million passengers a year that is growing at 20% a year.

Kathmandu airport to cut flight hours

As Kathmandu becomes more congested and polluted, and with remote online work becoming the norm, many professional Nepalis are planning to retire in Pokhara, or move there.&nbsp; With its stunning mountain panorama, balmy winters and proximity to a profusion of wilderness areas, builders are responding to this demand with new townhouses, housing development and apartments. One such block of flats is the 10-storey <a href="https://sungavaapartment.com/">Sungava Apartment</a> located at Phulbari above the Seti River, near the point where it flows into and under Pokhara. The imposing structure near Manipal Hospital is almost complete, and on a recent visit the site was strewn with huge boulders unearthed while digging the foundation.&nbsp; The Seti brought down these boulders during a gigantic flood that geologists estimate happened 800 years ago when a chunk of Annapurna IV broke off and ploughed into the glacier below. Today, Sungava (means ‘orchid’) sits safely on a high terrace, 100m above the blue-green Seti and commands a view of Dhaulagiri, Annapurna South, Machapuchre, Annapurna III and IV.&nbsp;  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/2024102411104_5f8fc736c86ea3c08d7bef43bb727081d3cc1a2caa55ae2b441717e6044de7e9.jpg" data-media-id="editor_1" data-image-id="2024102411104_5f8fc736c86ea3c08d7bef43bb727081d3cc1a2caa55ae2b441717e6044de7e9" data-rendition-name="original" width="2016" height="1512" loading="lazy" alt="High living below the Himalaya NT"> </figure>  The soil here is conglomerate that has solidified like concrete, and the boulders were extracted by heavy earthmovers. It is intriguing to think that these metamorphic rocks as big as cars, rounded by glacial grinding, were once a part of a much higher Annapurna IV. Even for those with little interest in geology, Sungava is an ideal place to contemplate the tectonic forces that pushed these peaks into the sky to be sculpted into delicate shapes by wind, snow, earthquake and avalanche over millions of years. The view of the Himalayan panorama from Sungava’s many balconies are breathtaking when not obscured by clouds, or the haze that drifts in from across the southern border. On most days, just watching the towering pyramid of Machapuchre (Tamu name: कतासुँ क्लिको) play hide and seek with the clouds is mesmerising. There are rocks aplenty at Phulbari, and it is probably the flowers that grew along the flat terraces e that gave the place its flowery name. The boulders will hopefully be turned into a rock garden while landscaping. An nearby restaurant complex is making the best use of the stones in its design, using flat rocks as outdoor benches and tables. Sungava was designed by the husband-wife architect team of Deepak Sherchan and Jyoti Joshi of <a href="https://thedarkmermaidamarbshrestha.blogspot.com/2013/12/creative-builders-collaborative-cbc.html">Creative Builders Collaborative (CBC)</a>, which also built Heritage Plaza, Indreni Apartment and numerous other projects in Nepal. Sadbhavana retains CBC’s trademark Newari-style masonry and here it borrows from the orange brickwork of the old town of Pokhara, integrating it with modern design elements. A few of those heritage houses are still standing in Ganesh Tole and Ram Krishna Tole in Pokhara’s old quarter.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/2024102411108_5eb64a4885961b6d30781cefeb1e8a313da313ac5227c7a66b60f0c7d48d6fab.jpg" data-media-id="editor_3" data-image-id="2024102411108_5eb64a4885961b6d30781cefeb1e8a313da313ac5227c7a66b60f0c7d48d6fab" data-rendition-name="original" width="1362" height="595" loading="lazy" alt="High living below the Himalaya NT"> </figure>  About 400m from the apartment past a bend on the river, and down below three tiers of terraces in the canyon is a suspension bridge. Below it, the Seti is still swollen with post-monsoon flow as it tumbles away in a hurry to head down south.&nbsp; Back at the apartment, it is quiet, far away from the hubbub of Lakeside a 15 minute drive away, and in the lap of greenery. There are 52 units at Sungava and it already has a close-knit prospective community of professionals, including doctors, publishers, engineers, and businesspeople from the renewable energy and IT sectors.&nbsp; Some residents say they opted for a second home in Pokhara to make it a ‘base camp’ to explore the Annapurnas with its many hiking trails made newly accessible with new roads. With the NRN citizenship law, overseas Nepalis can now also buy the flats. &nbsp; The floor plans include options for north and south-facing 3-bedroom apartments with verandas, and the facility has underground parking has EV charging, heated pool, sauna and gym. There are still some unsold apartments with panoramic views of the mountains and one can imagine oneself at the kitchen with its huge window, humming a ditty while preparing breakfast: “खाना पकाउँ हिमाल हेरेर...”

High living below the Himalaya

When the United Nations held its Summit of the Future at its headquarters in New York in September, many world leaders, including Nepal’s Prime Minister K P Oli, highlighted the effect of climate breakdown in increasing the frequency and intensity of natural disasters. What did not get as much attention was the long term impact of the climate crisis on food production. In fact, heat stress, weather extremes and the consequences on rain-fed agriculture is already being felt worldwide, undermining the chances of the <a href="https://unstats.un.org/sdgs/">UN’s Sustainable Development Goals (SDGs)</a> being met by 2030.&nbsp; The SDG’s 17 targets commit countries like Nepal to reduce poverty and inequality, end malnutrition, protect the natural environment, and ensure that citizens all enjoy health, justice and prosperity without leaving anyone behind.&nbsp; However, besides the impact of climate breakdown on agricultural production, in Nepal the area under cultivation is impacted by urban expansion, falling productivity and the need for expensive inputs like fertiliser and pesticides.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20241019041052_626413c5baf4dae407ac9579231b41daeb51510aa636b75aeb7489d94cca6a62.jpg" data-media-id="editor_1" data-image-id="20241019041052_626413c5baf4dae407ac9579231b41daeb51510aa636b75aeb7489d94cca6a62" data-rendition-name="original" width="999" height="1500" loading="lazy" alt="urban agriculture in Kathmandu"> <figcaption>Kathmandu's urban sprawl is eating into its fertile cultivable lands. Photo: TAYLOR MASON</figcaption> </figure>  Now, a new study led by Nepali researcher Prajal Pradhan at the University of Groningen in The Netherlands looks at how urban agriculture may offer a solution to falling food production and meeting SDG targets. The researchers evaluated 1,450 publications exploring the contributions of urban agriculture with both positive and negative effects, and published their findings in the journal Cells Report Sustainability. Urban agriculture can help achieve 17 SDGs, positively influencing 81 targets. However, it could also undermine 51 goals.&nbsp; Read also: <a href="https://nepalitimes.com/here-now/the-vanishing-land">The vanishing land</a>, Taylor Mason “Urban agriculture offers immense potential for sustainable development, but realising this potential depends crucially on adopting practices that minimise its adverse effects while maximising its benefits,” Pradhan explains. Urban agriculture can substantially enhance urban food security, provide employment to the urban poor, serve as ground water recharge in built-up areas, and preserve open spaces that can serve as safe havens during disasters like earthquakes. However, it also presents problems like the potential health risks from contamination and the need for expensive inputs. &nbsp; “Urban agriculture plays a definitive role in advancing the SDGs, but achieving this requires tailored, context-specific solutions that address the unique challenges of different regions,” says Yuanchao Hu of Wuhan University in China and who is a researcher at the Potsdam Institute for Climate Impact Research. “But it needs equitable access and rigorous management of environmental risks.”&nbsp; Rapid urbanisation is eating into Nepal’s most fertile agricultural land, which means farming in remaining open spaces inside cities can be a viable alternative, especially as food prices rise.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20241019041052_7b7c9413086226fbdc630d45acf772cfa1ced77a8970b9056ec5ec7e5226fdf8.jpg" data-media-id="editor_3" data-image-id="20241019041052_7b7c9413086226fbdc630d45acf772cfa1ced77a8970b9056ec5ec7e5226fdf8" data-rendition-name="original" width="1500" height="999" loading="lazy" alt="urban agriculture in Kathmandu"> <figcaption>A vegetable patch in between new houses in Thimi. Photo: TAYLOR MASON</figcaption> </figure>  “The conversion of Nepal’s most fertile land into cities is a severe problem,” Pradhan told Nepali Times. “Crop cultivation, horticulture, agroforestry, beekeeping, livestock rearing, or aquaculture can all be farming activities within and around cities.”&nbsp; The study makes recommendations for sustainable practices that build on the positive aspects of urban agriculture while mitigating the downsides, thereby promoting more resilient cities in future. Research shows that urban agriculture has been helping many countries attain SDG targets by enhancing food security and biodiversity while helping education and preservation of open spaces.&nbsp; Indeed, many farmers from the hinterland who have settled in Kathmandu Valley or other urban areas of the country have been practicing urban agriculture, leasing neighbourhood patches or cultivating roof gardens both out of necessity because of inflation and falling income to grow their own food, and also as a fulfilling hobby. Saurav Dhakal, a sustainability advocate with Story Cycle and now research fellow at the Asian Institute of Technology in Thailand, says there are socio-economic and environmental benefits of urban agriculture. “It provides benefits to all urban dwellers, regardless of their income status,” says Dhakal, “families get fresh food, and there are many other benefits like water retention, heat regulation and biodiversity. These are all public goods, so special government incentives may be needed.” It is not unusual to see vegetable patches and even paddy fields within inner city Kathmandu where an older generation of farmers are using available fertile land and <a href="https://archive.nepalitimes.com/article/Nepali-Times-Buzz/rooftop-gardens-kathmandu,1415">roof gardens to produce fresh, nutritious food </a>to reduce their dependence on food items that have to be bought after being trucked in from large distances.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/2024101905100_1291ce98dbbb8caed8702ac4b1d469b3e13016d7ecaaf3bfd5f91c974d3c0c77.jpg" data-media-id="editor_5" data-image-id="2024101905100_1291ce98dbbb8caed8702ac4b1d469b3e13016d7ecaaf3bfd5f91c974d3c0c77" data-rendition-name="original" width="1500" height="999" loading="lazy" alt="urban agriculture in Kathmandu"> <figcaption>An older generation of farmers are using any available fertile land to continue farming but it is getting more and more difficult. Photo: TAYLOR MASON </figcaption> </figure>  Nepal’s urban population grew rapidly from only 3.6% in 1991 to 25% today. There is large outmigration from the mountains to peri-urban areas of the Tarai, to Kathmandu Valley and Pokhara, with many young men then moving abroad for work. Kathmandu Valley’s population has swelled to nearly 3 million, and is growing at 6.5% a year. Dilip Shrestha, 71, used to work for Nepal Food Corporation, so he knew firsthand about inflation, shortages and vegetables with pesticide residue. So, when he designed his new house in Kathmandu, he built a spacious roof where he grows cucumber, ginger, garlic, coriander, onions, tomatoes, chili, beans, okra, pumpkin and lettuce. His family eats healthier, and he has reduced dependence on the market.&nbsp; The co-author of the Cell Reports Sustainability journal article, Daya Raj Subedi who is a PhD candidate at Beijing Forestry University, says urban agriculture also promotes inclusion and psycho-social wellbeing.&nbsp; He says, “A crucial finding of the study is the identification of opportunities and challenges associated with urban agriculture, it can promote sustainable transformation of society.” In Banepa, 55-year-old Bijaya Manandhar in her lifetime has watched the fertile farms of her neighbourhood that used to supply vegetables to Kathmandu, now completely built up with no open space left. The pandemic lockdown prompted her to turn to the family’s <a href="https://nepalitimes.com/banner/rooftop-agriculture-on-the-roof-of-the-world">ancestral livelihood by growing food</a> not on terrace farms, but on the roof terrace. Manandhar is now a part of <a href="https://nepalitimes.com/banner/rooftop-agriculture-on-the-roof-of-the-world%5C%5C">कौसी खेती र करेसाबारी क्रान्ती</a> (Rooftop Farming and Garden Revolution) which has an online membership of 52,000, and awards annual prizes to women who excel in urban agriculture.&nbsp;  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20241019041052_7257f5def8f823f35a799fa6f6825e153f2ffa406ac11325d4fe74049b79e96d.jpg" data-media-id="editor_8" data-image-id="20241019041052_7257f5def8f823f35a799fa6f6825e153f2ffa406ac11325d4fe74049b79e96d" data-rendition-name="original" width="1600" height="736" loading="lazy" alt="urban agriculture in Kathmandu"> <figcaption>Rooftop farming is gaining popularity as a form of urban agriculture. </figcaption> </figure>   <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20241019041052_beff1a4494ce896dd8fd383ee1f518e5448bcf7ea8bb138255391c7bcb9769ed.jpg" data-media-id="editor_9" data-image-id="20241019041052_beff1a4494ce896dd8fd383ee1f518e5448bcf7ea8bb138255391c7bcb9769ed" data-rendition-name="original" width="4000" height="3000" loading="lazy" alt="urban agriculture in Kathmandu"> </figure>  Pradhan says the challenge now is to upscale such examples of successful urban agricultural practices so they support Neal’s efforts to meet SDG targets. He adds, “Crop cultivation around cities can be protected by land use plans and regulations. Promoting community-based agriculture, including rooftop gardens, requires community engagement and public-private partnerships across the food value chain.”&nbsp; Such support would accelerate the popularity of existing rooftop farming and community gardens in Kathmandu Valley, or kitchen garden initiatives in Pokhara, and building on traditional farming practices that are preserved and integrated into urban settings like in Bhaktapur and Banepa. In Lalitpur, the Women Entrepreneurship Facilitation Center promotes urban farming enhancing both sustainability and empowerment.&nbsp; Another co-author of the report, Yuanchao Hu from China says followup research of the team will aim to identify good practices in local urban agriculture practices. He adds, “There are examples of urban agriculture that optimise sustainability, ensuring that it remains a viable solution for cities globally while countries try to meet SDG targets.” Prajal Pradhan, Daya Raj Subedi, Kshitij Dahal, Yuanchao Hu, Prakriti Gurung, Sijal Pokharel, Sagar Kafle, Biplav Khatri, Sudeeksha Basyal, Monika Gurung, and Aruna Joshi. Urban Agriculture matters for sustainable development. Cell Reports Sustainability, 1:100217, 2024. [DOI: 10.1016/j.crsus.2024.100217] Prajal Pradhan (<a href="mailto:p.pradhan@rug.nl">p.pradhan@rug.nl</a>) This article is brought to you by <a href="https://nepalitimes.com/" target="_blank">Nepali Times</a>, in collaboration with <a href="https://inpsjapan.com/en/" target="_blank">INPS Japan</a> and <a href="https://sgi-peace.org/" target="_blank">Soka Gakkai International</a>, in consultative status with UN ECOSOC.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20240630110640_30c3782f9c09219bf1c249b51483a3cfb7a53a06d117d2aebd23ca7080d12758.jpg" data-media-id="editor_14" data-image-id="20240630110640_30c3782f9c09219bf1c249b51483a3cfb7a53a06d117d2aebd23ca7080d12758" data-rendition-name="original" width="680" height="103" loading="lazy" alt="SDG logo"> </figure>

Back to the land in the cities

The 700-year-old Lakshmi Narasingha temple in Bhaktapur houses a rare half-lion and half-human incarnation of Lord Vishnu carrying the Goddess Lakshmi. The temple was destroyed in the 1934 mega earthquake that killed 10,000 people and destroyed many monuments in Kathmandu Valley. It was rebuilt by a German project in the 1980s, but as a single-storey structure instead of its original two-tier pagoda design.&nbsp; With new findings from in-depth research, Bhaktapur municipality began re-restoring the temple in 2021, preserving its original architecture.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20241017131016_2fae38cce543ad7b1f6de632feb3e212e08ed1acedd747830e949d7b8e878f18.jpg" data-media-id="editor_0" data-image-id="20241017131016_2fae38cce543ad7b1f6de632feb3e212e08ed1acedd747830e949d7b8e878f18" data-rendition-name="original" width="2048" height="1365" loading="lazy" alt="In with the old in Nepal NT"> </figure>  “Our temples and heritage sites hold deep meaning. It is disheartening to witness how often they lose their original elements, whether by design or accident,” explains Kumar Chawal of the Consumer Committee of Bhaktapur. “There is a need to preserve our architecture and protect its historical value for future generations. Otherwise, we risk losing a vital part of our identity.” The Laksmi Narsingha restoration is similar to the Bhai Dega temple in Patan Darbar Square which also collapsed in 1934, but was rebuilt with a Moghul-style dome by the Rana government at the time. Only two months before the 2015 earthquake, heritage conservationists had started to rebuild Bhai Dega as the original three-tier based on early photographs. But priorities shifted when four other temples in the square were brought down by the 7.8M earthquake on 25 April 2015.&nbsp;  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20241017131016_697ea707d9ad163be5de5f2efbf5b70d3cab771adcc22f0fae6bf937c6cb0130.jpg" data-media-id="editor_1" data-image-id="20241017131016_697ea707d9ad163be5de5f2efbf5b70d3cab771adcc22f0fae6bf937c6cb0130" data-rendition-name="original" width="2048" height="1365" loading="lazy" alt="In with the old in Nepal NT"> </figure>  This showed how damage to monuments in Kathmandu Valley spanned from one earthquake to the next. Bhai Dega restoration remains half-complete to this day because money for its restoration ran out.&nbsp; Whereas Bhai Dega restoration was done by the Kathmandu Valley Preservation Trust with grants from western embassies and international foundations, in Bhaktapur it is the municipality itself that allocated the Rs30.7 million needed to restore the Lakshmi Narasingha temple. The expected date of completion is early 2025. The municipality and local communities are focusing on two main aspects: preserving the past and promoting localisation. The restoration team has designed a blueprint for the temple by using historical photographs and insights from older generations.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20241017131016_182882fdc393c99e70d1d0490319e415229563666c4934e3a582426ebf00ca30.jpg" data-media-id="editor_2" data-image-id="20241017131016_182882fdc393c99e70d1d0490319e415229563666c4934e3a582426ebf00ca30" data-rendition-name="original" width="1200" height="560" loading="lazy" alt="In with the old in Nepal NT"> </figure>  “At first, the Lakshmi Narasingha temple had only one entrance, but during the demolition process, we uncovered the foundations of four doors. Now, we are restoring all of them. This is an example of how our ancient structures have changed over time, often without our knowledge,” says Chawal. “Constructing temples is not like building houses. They carry historical and spiritual values, which is why they hold a special place in our hearts,” he adds. By replicating ancient design elements and rebuilding the temple as accurately as possible to its original form, the team has stayed true to Bhaktapur’s soul. But the restoration also revived ancient techniques that were in danger of being forgotten, generating employment for woodcarvers, masons, and contractors. The community of Bhaktapur’s Gahiti neighbourhood near the famous Nyatapola Temple has also set aside specific days for locals to volunteer in the reconstruction work. This has encouraged young people to take pride in ownership of their heritage. Families have also supported the effort by donating funds for bells, the temple pinnacle, and other structural features to the temple.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20241017131016_db850ec0c084cdbe54f65bee92dad2ad8122d20fd60ec87ec086fbb9d2f72bd6.jpg" data-media-id="editor_3" data-image-id="20241017131016_db850ec0c084cdbe54f65bee92dad2ad8122d20fd60ec87ec086fbb9d2f72bd6" data-rendition-name="original" width="2048" height="1365" loading="lazy" alt="In with the old in Nepal NT"> </figure>  “I feel at peace knowing I have contributed my sweat to restoring this temple,” said one volunteer. “It is our duty to preserve our temples and heritage. The Nyatapola area will look magical once this temple is completed.” Community mobilisation is a long-standing tradition in Bhaktapur. In the past, locals have actively participated in the restoration of other temples in the city, such as Bhairav and Nyatapola fostering a strong sense of ownership. This collective engagement has not only been crucial in preserving the city's historical monuments but also in strengthening the bond between local communities and their heritage, says officials at the municipality. While securing funding is essential, and the municipality showed it values heritage conservation, the Lakshmi Narasingha restoration is proof that active involvement and sense of responsibility of the local community is as important, if not more. Local involvement also means that the monuments will be cared for into the future, When locals take ownership of these efforts, the restored monuments are not only protected in the present but are also cared for in the future.

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In with the old in Nepal