<figure><img src="https://superdesk-pro-c.s3.amazonaws.com/sd-nepalitimes/20221114111124/637217729c7e80680e0ba9e9jpeg.jpg" alt="" width="2048" height="1536"/><figcaption>Maya Devi temple. Photo: SAHINA SHRESTHA</figcaption></figure>The story goes that when the Buddha was approaching his mahaparinirvana at age 80, he advised his faithful disciple Ananda that there were four great places of pilgrimage associated with his life.The locations of the Buddha’s enlightenment, Bodh Gaya and Sarnath where he first taught the dharma were identified early on. But the mystery of where he passed away, Kushinagar, and where he was born and grew up, Kapilvastu and Lumbini, were not solved until the end of the 19th century.Over the years, there was speculation about where the Shakyamuni Buddha was actually born – even though 2,600 years ago there were no modern nation state boundaries in the Subcontinent. But a finding from 3rd century BCE helped clear the doubt.That was when Emperor Ashoka, following the devastating battle of Kalinga, set out on a pilgrimage to Lumbini with Upagupta. There he erected a sandstone pillar surmounted with a horse finial atop an inverted lotus, and an inscription in Pali to commemorate his visit in 249 BCE.The two Ashokan inscriptions, one in Nigali Sagar near Tilaurakot referring to Konakamuni (a past Buddha) and another in Lumbini found in the 19th century showed that in the Mauryan period, the place where the pillar stands was considered to be the birthplace of the Buddha.<img src="https://superdesk-pro-c.s3.amazonaws.com/sd-nepalitimes/20221114111124/637217759c7e80680e0ba9eajpeg.jpg" alt="" width="1228" height="834">Over the centuries, the site saw the pilgrimage by many Chinese monks, Faxian in the 5th century and Xuanzang in the 7th century being the two famous ones. Their accounts of the travels were later used by antiquarians in British India to locate the sites of the Buddha’s birth and where he grew up.But the popularity of the site waned until it was rediscovered in 1896, and excavations began. These days those visiting the Maya Devi temple in <a href="https://www.nepalitimes.com/opinion/lumbini-is-not-a-buddhist-disneyland/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Lumbini</a>, may not be aware of what they are seeing inside the complex.Excavations in Lumbini have revealed many structures that were built over the centuries, one of the most sacred being the Shakya tank, a pond where the Buddha’s mother Queen Maya Devi is believed to have taken a bath before giving birth.Maya Devi is believed to have given birth to Siddhartha Gautam in 623 BC, while she was on her way to her parents’ home in Devdaha on a palanquin. She gave birth standing, while clutching to the branch of a sal tree. She died a week later, and the baby was raised by his aunt, Prajapati.A 1,800-year-old stone sculpture, eroded by centuries of worship and a marker stone found in 1995 at the nativity site locate the exact spot in Lumbini’s sacred garden where the Buddha was born.Archaeologists have also uncovered ruins of monasteries dating from 3rd century BC to the 7th century AD, as well as of stupas, some built much more recently 600 years ago.In 2011, an international team led by Robin Coningham of Durham University and Kosh Prasad Acharya, the former Director General of Nepal’s Department of Archaeology  uncovered remnants of a wooden structure beneath the pavement in the Maya Devi Temple.When analysed, it looked like a tree shrine and was dated to around 550 BC, giving historians new evidence to consider as they attempt to reconstruct the Buddha’s life.<figure><img src="https://superdesk-pro-c.s3.amazonaws.com/sd-nepalitimes/20221114111124/637217789c7e80680e0ba9ebjpeg.jpg" alt="" width="2048" height="1536"><figcaption> </figcaption></figure>But the story of the Buddha is much more than just of Lumbini alone. If Nepal is to commemorate more holistically the Buddha’s life, it has to have an integrated approach and include other sites over the Greater Lumbini Area spanning Rupandehi, Nawalparasi and Kapilvastu, which have many archaeological sites, some of which are directly associated with the Buddha’s life.In<a href="https://www.nepalitimes.com/banner/buddhas-birthday-in-his-birthplace/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer"> Tilaurakot-Kapilvastu</a>, the city where the Buddha is believed to have spent his first 29 years as Prince Siddhartha Gautam, and from where he left on his journey to spiritual enlightenment, archaeologists recently used ground penetrating radar to detect a palatial walled complex, street grid of a city, a brick wall tank and a monastic compound, and other historical objects.Read Also: <a href="https://www.nepalitimes.com/latest/drone-view-of-lumbinis-monsoon-greenery/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Drone view of Lumbini’s monsoon greenery </a>In 249 BC, Emperor Ashoka erected an inscribed pillar commemorating his veneration and expansion of the nirvana stupa of the Konakmuni Buddha. In 1895, two fragments of the pillar were discovered: the upper portion was half submerged in Nilgi Sagar pond and the lower part was buried. Since the plinth on which it once stood is missing, the original location remains unknown, but some scholars believe that it was erected at the birthplace of the Konakmuni Buddha.<img src="https://superdesk-pro-c.s3.amazonaws.com/sd-nepalitimes/20221114111124/6372177b9c7e80680e0ba9ecjpeg.jpg" alt="" width="1249" height="883">Kudan is another site of historical significance. Some scholars have suggested this may be the site of Nigrodharama, the banyan grove where Gautam Buddha met his father years after his departure from Kapilvastu and where his son was ordained a monk. Gotihawa, is considered the birthplace of the Krakkuchanda Buddha, another one of the earlier Buddhas. It has a large brick stupa and a stump of an Ashokan pillar. Unfortunately, most of the pillar is gone, so it is not possible to know what was written.The Ramagram stupa which is 10m high and 23.5m in diameter is on the tentative list for the World Heritage status, and is believed to be one of the original sites housing the mortal remains of the Buddha. According to ancient scripts, the seven other stupas were opened by Ashoka and the relics distributed – but the naga prevented Ashoka from opening the stupa here.There are other sites that have been identified in the three surrounding districts. Building a circuit with all the culturally and spiritually important places and telling the story correctly can help solve a problem (see below) Lumbini has been facing for a long time.<h4>The Masterplan</h4><figure><img src="https://superdesk-pro-c.s3.amazonaws.com/sd-nepalitimes/20221114111124/6372177e9c7e80680e0ba9edjpeg.jpg" alt="" width="1400" height="502"><figcaption> </figcaption></figure>The challenge Lumbini faces now is how to cope with the larger numbers of pilgrims and tourists visiting the holy site. Before the pandemic, while the number of visitors in Lumbini was high, they usually came in from India’s Buddhist circuit and only spent a few hours before heading back.The infrastructure was poor, there were not too many hotels with proper facilities. Lumbini was difficult to get to. Now, an international airport is being inaugurated just 10km to the east, and a new influx of visitors is expected.Before the pandemic, 1.7 million pilgrims visited Lumbini by land in a year, of these 300,000 were from outside of Nepal and India. But on average, they spent less than an hour in Lumbini.For centuries after Ashoka visited and commemorated the nativity site, Lumbini was retaken by the surrounding jungles. It was only in the 1890s that British explorers looking for hardwood timber for railway sleepers came upon the Ashokan pillar.In 1967, the United Nations Secretary-General U Thant, a devout Buddhist from Burma, toured Lumbini on elephant-back, and is reported to have wept on seeing the condition of the birthplace of the Buddha.Back in New York, U Thant set up a UN committee to turn Lumbini into an international centre for peace. Noted Japanese architect <a href="http://archive.nepalitimes.com/news.php?id=9848#.Yn8SBOhBxPZ" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Kenzō Tange</a>, who had designed the Hiroshima Museum, was hired to draw up a <a href="https://www.nepalitimes.com/here-now/u-thant-kenzo-tange-and-the-buddhas-birthplace/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">master plan</a>.Nepal established the Lumbini Development Trust (LDT) which is implementing Kenzō Tange’s master plan and includes a monastic zone, a library and Lumbini Village for visitors. A canal bisects the site with a museum and visitor centre on the north end and the Maya Devi Temple on the south.The eastern monastic zone was set aside for Theravada Buddhism and the western for Mahayana Buddhism. The master plan is still being broadly followed and is nearing completion, but structures are already showing signs of disrepair.Even the visitor’s centre in Lumbini is in a sorry state, there are no information boards that tell the visitors about the site.“Our expectations are high when it comes to Lumbini but the infrastructure is lacking,” says Purushottam Aryal, an entrepreneur who runs Buddhagram, a robotic museum outside of Lumbini gate. “We have guests who complain about the lack of restroom and having only one gate to purchase tickets.”Despite nearly 2 million annual visitors pre-pandemic, only about 2% of the pilgrims visited the other sacred sites from the Buddha’s life like Niglihawa, Gotihawa, Kudan and Ramagram, either because they are unaware of them or because they are too difficult to get to.Currently, most international visitors to Lumbini come from India as part of the Buddhist circuit that includes Bodh Gaya, Sarnath, Kushinagar, where facilities and connectivity are better. Pilgrims preferred travelling through India to Lumbini rather than flying to Kathmandu and then making their way to the sacred site.“Nepalis rarely hire guides. Indian tourists come in with their own guides from India, who narrate their own version of the story of Lumbini. If they hire local guides they can get authentic information. Why would anyone stay for long if all they do is go in and out?” asks Mahesh Pati Mishra, a local guide in Lumbini.The upcoming Lumbini Museum will fill this gap. The existing museum is being upgraded and expanded to international standards, that tells the story of the Buddha, says the museum’s Sumnima Udas.Located at the entrance of the Sacred Garden, the Lumbini Museum aims to help transform the sacred place as a major spiritual and cultural centre while setting a standard for how art and heritage can be preserved, presented and promoted.The museum has brought in talent from Nepal and around the world to make it a state-of-the art project to educate and promote the Buddha’s message of compassion and peace, and re-imagine U Thant’s original goal inside the cylindrical modules designed by Kenzō Tange.Explains Udas: “There are different kinds of museums, this is not going to be a museum with just statues. It will be about the storytelling. And it doesn’t have to be huge, it can just be a beautiful little gem where once you go in you leave with a better sense of what had happened in Lumbini, why the birth story matters, and what we as human beings can learn from it.”Read Also: <a href="https://www.nepalitimes.com/here-now/u-thant-kenzo-tange-and-the-buddhas-birthplace/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">U Thant, Kenzō Tange and the Buddha’s birthplace</a>, Kunda Dixit<figure><img src="https://superdesk-pro-c.s3.amazonaws.com/sd-nepalitimes/20221114111124/637217819c7e80680e0ba9eejpeg.jpg" alt="" width="640" height="818"><figcaption> </figcaption></figure>Lumbini over Time2,645 years agoThe birth of Siddhartha Gautama in a sal grove in Lumbini while his mother is enroute to Devdaha2,575 years agoThe Buddha dies at the age of 803rd Century BCEEmperor Ashoka visits Lumbini to commemorate the nativity site with a stone pillar5th Century BCEChinese monks Faxian and Xuanzang visit Lumbini and find it in ruins1312King of Jumla, Ripu Malla, carves graffiti with his name on Ashoka’s pillar 1896Ashoka’s pillar is rediscovered by General Khadga Shamshere, Governor of Tansen, and German archaeologist Anton Fuhrer1899Indian archaeologist Purna Chandra Mukherji finds the eroded nativity sculpture1932-39Archaeological excavations by General Keshar Shamsher reveal ancient monasteries and temples1956King Mahendra visits Lumbini1959UN Secretary-General Dag Hammarskjöld visits Lumbini during trip to Nepal1967UN Secretary-General U Thant visits Lumbini, and pledges to develop it as an international peace centre1972Kenzō Tange is commissioned to create a master plan, which is completed in 19781995Department of Archaeology excavates the marker stone at exact spot where the Buddha was born1997UNESCO declares Lumbini a World Heritage Site2003Mayadevi Temple opens to the public for the first time on Buddha Jayanti<h4>Pilgrim’s progress in Lumbini</h4><figure><img src="https://superdesk-pro-c.s3.amazonaws.com/sd-nepalitimes/20221114111124/637217839c7e80680e0ba9efjpeg.jpg" alt="" width="900" height="600"><figcaption> </figcaption></figure>The retreat of Covid-19 and the inauguration of the <a href="https://www.nepalitimes.com/latest/bhairawas-new-airport-already-too-small/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Gautam Buddha International airport</a> on 16 May has breathed new hope to Lumbini, which had seen almost no pilgrim and tourist traffic since 2020.As many as 15 new hotels were planned in anticipation of the new airport, but had to halt construction when the lockdowns hit. Some of the older hotels here were sold to new owners and the Lumbini Development Trust that manages the sacred site lost significant revenue.“Many new hotels were being built because we expected a surge of traffic with the new airport,” says Lila Mani Sharma of Hotel Association of Lumbini. “They had taken bank loans and because they had already invested so much, they could not abandon the project.” Now, construction activity has picked up again in the 10km stretch from the airport to Lumbini, as well as on the road linking the airport to the Bhairawa-Butwal highway.The pandemic not only hit the hotel sector but also the farmers who supplied produce to the hotels, guides, travel agencies and others who relied on the sector.Laxmi Choudhari of Mahilawar is looking to inaugurate his new homestay on the auspicious Buddha Jayanti, the very day that the new airport is being inaugurated.“I have been working in the hotel business for a while and have wanted to do something on my own. The new airport will surely help bring more guests and as homestays we can provide a more authentic experience for them,” says Choudhari.Lumbini’s Guide Association and Hotel Association are also cautiously optimistic. “If more people come directly to Nepal first instead of crossing over from India, it will be good for the local business. They will spend more time here and include more places around Lumbini in their itinerary,” says Sharma.But according to industry experts, just having an international airport does not guarantee anything. Says Anu Lama, tourism specialist at ICIMOD, “There has to be an integrated approach bringing together the cultural, spiritual and natural aspect of Lumbini and involving the local communities. We have to tell and sell our story.”Read Also:<a href="https://www.nepalitimes.com/latest/bhairawas-new-airport-already-too-small/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Bhairawa airport already to small</a><a href="https://www.nepalitimes.com/banner/protecting-lumbinis-rare-cranes/" target="_blank" rel="noopener noreferrer">Protecting Lumbini’s rare cranes</a>, Rajendra N Suwal

Sahina Shrestha

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Telling the story of Buddha’s Lumbini

‘One early morning, we heard the ambassador’s wife cry out, “Ram, Ram, Ram!” A disaster has befallen Nepal!” She had heard on the radio that a fire had consumed Singha Durbar." This is not about the arson attack on 9 September 2025, but the one on 8 July, 1973. It started in the South Wing of the then single-largest building in all of Nepal. It took two days to bring the blaze under control, requiring the use of explosives to demolish one wing to protect the imposing western facade. As Bhekh Bahadur Thapa recalls in the English translation of his memoir A Life in Public Service: Nepal from Autocracy to Democracy, he was then on leave from the Nepal government serving with the IDRC in Ottawa.&nbsp; He had already served as Nepal’s Finance Secretary at age 25, went on to be Finance Minister and Governor of Nepal Rastra Bank. He was already younger than some of the GenZ ministers in Nepal’s present RSP government. Thapa, now 89, was at the launch of the book in February which was attended by former diplomats and bureaucrats. After speeches by panelists, there was a question from the audience about how Thapa had managed to be the diplomat he was, managing Nepal’s international relations on the world stage.&nbsp; Writer and journalist Akhilesh Upadhyay, who was moderating the panel, responded by going into the section of the book where we see Thapa as an ambassador to the US, playing tennis with White House officials, cultivating a network of contacts to project the identity and welfare of Nepal, and making it possible for a state visit by King Birendra to Ronald Reagan’s America. The book is full of anecdotes that suggest Thapa was a clever and strategic diplomat, always calm and unruffled, easily making friends in high places with his maturity and engaging sense of humour. Thapa’s memoir is heavy on details about Nepal’s administrative history during the years he was active in public service, serving as minister and ambassador under three kings: Mahendra, Birendra and Gyanendra, and alongside five prime ministers.&nbsp; Aside from an insider look on how certain treaties, development deals and research projects in Nepal came into fruition, Thapa goes into great detail about his personal and professional relationships with the kings, ministers, ambassadors, foreign leaders and politicians.&nbsp; As a reader, one is struck by the level of detail around the events that unfolded in Nepal over the years during Thapa’s tenure. Was Thapa recording a journal over the years of the events and the conversations that transpired, or were they committed to his phenomenal memory? Either way, the reader gets a glimpse of Nepal’s recent history from the early days of the Panchayat, through the People’s Movement and the democracy period, the Maoist insurgency, Royal Palace massacre of 2001, and Gyanendra’s coup of 2005.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/2026041204048_125dc8ae300a1e33124f394abe724d42727f83e067b0201d2008b58d60c459a4.jpg" data-media-id="editor_0" data-image-id="2026041204048_125dc8ae300a1e33124f394abe724d42727f83e067b0201d2008b58d60c459a4" data-rendition-name="original" width="1584" height="1000" loading="lazy" alt="How to win friends and influence nations NT"> </figure>  Not enough is said about the political parties of the time whose presence led to the way Nepal’s multiparty democracy came to be shaped. The book keeps its focus on the administration and the key figures around it, mostly those in the Panchayat era. Towards the second half of the book, we do start to hear about political parties, but not in great depth. Another figure whose presence in the book is conspicuously less prominent is that of his wife, Rita Thapa — the person who seems to have rescued him every time financial quandary or family care became a challenge. Yet, we do not see her as a full person. Perhaps because of the personal tragedies in his life, the children are also barely mentioned.&nbsp; The book is therefore less personal and more technical. Throughout, we learn about Thapa’s thinking as he navigated the world of diplomacy to win him the trust of those who mattered. There are tips here for a new generation of Nepali officials and diplomats about how much commitment and focus is needed to be good at one’s job and serve the national interest. This book adds to tomes that have been written on Nepal’s fragile relationship with India. ‘India has always wished for Nepal to remain dependent on it,’ writes Thapa, who served as Nepal’s ambassador to India and later in the Eminent Persons Group &nbsp;on Indo-Nepal relations that has been allowed to languish. The book has several insights into the Indo-Nepal trysts with diplomacy and agency.&nbsp; China’s role is also recorded, viewed through conversations during a visit to Beijing, but all that was before Nepal’s neighbour to the north emerged as a world economic and military power. The book also has such sudden instances of quirkiness and humour. For instance, we see a young Thapa in America explaining to a government official why he would like to return to Nepal instead of settling down in the US. “Because, Nepal is beautiful,” he said. The text is immaculate and does not read much like a translation, credit for which clearly goes to the team that put the edition together: translator Prawin Adhikari, &nbsp;Anagha Neelakanthan and Bhekh Thapa’s daughter, Manjushree. As Nepal enters a new era of governance and diplomacy, A Life in Public Service: Nepal from Autocracy to Democracy should be essential reading for students of political science, economics and foreign affairs who can gain a fresh perspective on the country’s trajectory.&nbsp; There are dozens of forgotten state secrets recorded in the book, but the reader must also remember this is a story told from one person’s perspective and there may be others.&nbsp; So, what really made Thapa the diplomat he was? I met him in 2004 at the Kantipur TV studio when he was serving as king Gyanendra’s foreign minister. He was there for a studio interview, and I was just done with my English newscast.&nbsp; He surprised me at the door: “Pratibha! I’ve been reading your articles in The Kathmandu Post. You must keep writing.” I thanked him, glad to have been noticed for my work by a stranger. That was perhaps one of the things that set Thapa apart — he excelled at staying close to those in power, while also noticing those who were not.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20260412040412_213e706136a038ec9f5e2b8c6d7f7c1e9ceed9479e22fe2884872ad7bd20955f.jpg" data-media-id="editor_1" data-image-id="20260412040412_213e706136a038ec9f5e2b8c6d7f7c1e9ceed9479e22fe2884872ad7bd20955f" data-rendition-name="original" width="1136" height="702" loading="lazy" alt="Book details"> </figure>

How to win friends and influence nations

This is the 91st episode of Diaspora Diaries, a Nepali Times series in collaboration with Migration Lab providing a platform to share experiences of living, working and studying abroad. I have still not come to terms with the reality that my daughter Ruby Thakur is now the Deputy Speaker of Nepal’s Parliament. Sometimes, when I am walking, the thought hits me, and I cannot believe it.&nbsp; Things changed for my daughter in a very short time. I had dreamt that the best my daughter could achieve was a good engineering job. Fate had bigger plans for her. She is no longer just my daughter, she is the nation’s daughter. Nepal’s daughter.&nbsp; My children’s education was always my foremost priority. That is the main reason I went overseas for employment. I realised the value of education while working in Saudi Arabia. In my office, colleagues with good education earn $8,000 per month working on computers. Those with low education toil outdoors in the heat for much lower wages. A good education or skills can change everything. I am in Nepal on vacation and will soon return to my job. Ruby is all set now. But I still have to take care of my other children's education. As the eldest son, I myself never got a chance to prioritise my own education. I dropped out in Grade 7 because I had to take care of my ageing parents and younger siblings. I have done all kinds of jobs. I worked in a landlord’s field for a share of the harvest. Even now my wife and I farm for the land owner and have to give away half of what we grow.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20260413120444_051b61e01a5189af538aa1e011acd3e2b38d5f42825116b2afd325d93d0c519b.jpg" data-media-id="editor_0" data-image-id="20260413120444_051b61e01a5189af538aa1e011acd3e2b38d5f42825116b2afd325d93d0c519b" data-rendition-name="original" width="4032" height="2268" loading="lazy" alt="DD"> <figcaption>Sogarath Thakur during a break in Nepal with wife tending to his farm.</figcaption> </figure>   <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20260413120448_8a1c3ac3fd559026bc6f981cc8dc82cb8ad09a3a4f55fb9f6f7fd5f49c3d5571.jpg" data-media-id="editor_1" data-image-id="20260413120448_8a1c3ac3fd559026bc6f981cc8dc82cb8ad09a3a4f55fb9f6f7fd5f49c3d5571" data-rendition-name="original" width="4032" height="2268" loading="lazy" alt="DD"> </figure>  Then I worked as a barber, my family’s line of occupation. I went door to door cutting people’s hair and later worked in a relative’s saloon. Hairstyles were simple back then, and I got to keep half the fee. I also worked in a brick factory where I was paid weekly. &nbsp; I married when I was 16, and my wife was a year younger. As my family and responsibilities grew, I had to migrate leaving behind my three children including Ruby who was just three months old.&nbsp; I went to Qatar where I continued working as a barber. It was a large saloon and the standards for cleanliness and professionalism were higher. I had to hand over 70% of my daily earnings to the employer. I had to rely on my colleague to translate what the customer wanted. But I slowly became fluent in Arabic. I used to jot down words in Nepali and Arabic and memorise them. In Qatar, customers even came at night for haircuts, and people stayed up late. I would work till 3AM.&nbsp; Communicating with my family was one-way. I would go to Bismillah and ask someone to type out questions to my family about their whereabouts, how the harvest was that season. I would offer very little information about my life in Qatar because it was not easy. What was the point of getting them all worried? What could they do? I never received a letter in return, so throughout my time in Qatar, I never knew how my family was faring. When I appeared in the village after five years without any advance notice, it was a bittersweet reunion, and I had no gifts. I still remember how unfamiliar my village felt when I came home after so many years. I had to ask for directions. When I came home, Ruby was already in school. I had left her in my wife’s arms five years prior. I missed her growing up, and did not even see her pictures. My wife had to introduce her to me as her father. But it took just 15 minutes for her to warm up to me.&nbsp; The Arabic skills I had picked up in Qatar came in handy when I remigrated two years later to Saudi Arabia. I worked as a labourer in the desert heat, but once my company found out I spoke Arabic, I was hired for an indoor job as an office boy. The struggle in Qatar had paid off. I worked in an air conditioned office serving tea or coffee, doing bank runs or getting documents signed and photocopied. I have worked in the same company for the past 20 years, sending money home.&nbsp;  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20260413120448_f083fa873a6d77b19c8b0bdde623415c643a151fb550c57ff4e52b3c2431355f.jpg" data-media-id="editor_2" data-image-id="20260413120448_f083fa873a6d77b19c8b0bdde623415c643a151fb550c57ff4e52b3c2431355f" data-rendition-name="original" width="5712" height="3213" loading="lazy" alt="DD"> </figure>   <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20260413120452_5ccd9a01ee05ce26b71381725108215d0f0d3806508b0cb482aabcfea09bbaef.jpg" data-media-id="editor_3" data-image-id="20260413120452_5ccd9a01ee05ce26b71381725108215d0f0d3806508b0cb482aabcfea09bbaef" data-rendition-name="original" width="4032" height="3024" loading="lazy" alt="DD"> </figure>  My wife is not just my children’s guardian, but also mine throughout the two decades I was away. I trust her with all my earnings, and she manages our household finances well. She makes sure that the children’s school fees and other expenses are paid on time. These days, with video calls, things have become much easier for me to stay in touch with home.&nbsp; When Ruby told me she wanted to do an engineering diploma, I was happy. Later, her friends inspired her to join politics so she started getting involved with Shram Sanskriti Party. I first found out she got the proportional representation nomination through social media while on my work duty in Saudi Arabia. I was so excited, but even more so when she was elected Deputy Speaker. I was back home in Dhanusha on my vacation at the time.&nbsp; We are overjoyed and waiting for her to come back to the village for a visit when she gets a chance so we can celebrate properly with everyone. I plan to go back to Saudi Arabia as originally planned, I have a good job and will work for maybe five more years. Ruby has taken 75% of the load off my back. She can help take care of her siblings.&nbsp; I sleep at 8PM every day and wake up at 5AM to exercise before my day in Saudi Arabia begins – I have stuck to the same routine for the last two decades and it has worked well for me and my health. I have a good rapport with my boss who is an Egyptian. My requests to resign have often been met with counter-offers to stay on. My honesty and hard work have won me the company's trust. I will go back and resume working as I have, despite my daughter’s huge achievements. I am still a farmer’s son, a simple man who has to fulfil his family responsibilities. My colleagues in Saudi Arabia are aware that Ruby is Deputy Speaker in Nepal’s Parliament, they are all happy for me and have congratulated me. This time, when I go back, I have promised them that I will throw a bakhri party to celebrate my daughter’s achievement.

The nation’s daughter

This is the 90th episode of Diaspora Diaries, a Nepali Times series in collaboration with Migration Lab providing a platform to share experiences of living, working and studying abroad. The Musahar community lives in the Nepal Tarai and India, they have been historically excluded and are at the bottom of the economic and caste ladder. Many families still work as sharecroppers for landlords, but overseas migration is changing their lives as this conversation between Abhinash Sada and Lalit Majhi shows. Both were home for a vacation from work in Malaysia which coincided with the election. They are hopeful that the new RSP government will improve things.&nbsp; Abhinash: I was born into such poverty that we worried about the next meal. My family used to work near the river, mining sand and gravel. They were paid in rice. Sometimes we children went to the field to help with work, not for money but for the roti we got for lunch. I was eight when I was sent to school, and I still remember the first day. Lalit: We were classmates. Abhinash already knew how to recite the Nepali alphabet, but did not know how to read the letters. Meanwhile, I knew how to write s v u but did not know what those letters stood for. I just liked using a stick to scribble the alphabets in the sand while tending to the water buffalos. We finally learnt the alphabets properly in school. We used to skip school a lot but became interested after they offered sports like volleyball, and they also let us use a computer once every week. We started focusing on our studies, and Abinash used to stay at my my house so we could start studying together at 4AM because the teacher said our minds were freshest in the morning.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20260411040436_431dc4b60a1a49977f5fea69b19aaf66b172e3b606573dd9673aa32c9eb9e2b2.jpg" data-media-id="editor_0" data-image-id="20260411040436_431dc4b60a1a49977f5fea69b19aaf66b172e3b606573dd9673aa32c9eb9e2b2" data-rendition-name="original" width="1787" height="1000" loading="lazy" alt="DD 90"> </figure>  Abhinash: I used to sleep over at Lalit’s house so we could get up and study together early in the morning before school. We enjoyed studying so much we even asked the teacher for more homework. Sometimes, we used to skip class to do some work to earn some money so we could afford stationery or uniforms. Lalit ranked better than me in class.&nbsp; Lalit: My best memories of childhood was us swimming in the river after the rains when water levels were high. My mother thought we would get sick, but we did not listen. When we finally came home in the evenings, she would be fuming. My father worked in Punjab as a contractor and took fellow villagers there to work.&nbsp;  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20260411040432_0f8b3936c1edef4ff2e3682a66131278bf822022b1e8ae3aca1418e0fa232136.jpg" data-media-id="editor_1" data-image-id="20260411040432_0f8b3936c1edef4ff2e3682a66131278bf822022b1e8ae3aca1418e0fa232136" data-rendition-name="original" width="1778" height="1000" loading="lazy" alt="DD 90"> <figcaption>Abhinash with his family.</figcaption> </figure>  Abhinash: My father went to Saudi Arabia to support the family. When he came home for a break, he enrolled me in a private school so my English would improve and private schools were also stricter. I was in Grade 5 in the government school, but the private school put me in kindergarten. It felt strange because everyone else was much younger. After three years, I rejoined Grade 6 in the government school but Lalit had already moved on to Grade 8. We no longer studied together. Lalit: I did not pass my SLC. Instead of retaking the exam, I went to Chennai and got a dishwashing job although I was promised waiter. I came back after a month and started getting my paperwork done for Qatar. I borrowed Rs100,000 from a villager at 36% interest. Even so, in three years there I helped my family repay loans and bail out my eldest brother who had been cheated in Malaysia. All my savings in Qatar and what my middle brother earned in Malaysia went to rescue our oldest brother.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20260411040436_716000dceca4fbf31b9364fa712e30cbdca83783d59c8e10b47f6ae3e39b8825.jpg" data-media-id="editor_2" data-image-id="20260411040436_716000dceca4fbf31b9364fa712e30cbdca83783d59c8e10b47f6ae3e39b8825" data-rendition-name="original" width="1778" height="1000" loading="lazy" alt="DD 90"> <figcaption>Lalit with his mother.</figcaption> </figure>  Abhinash: We Musahars can work hard. Our forebears worked from childhood tilling the fields of land owners whose children went to school. Saying no was not an option. Our fathers’ generation prioritised education because they did not want us to be trapped in servitude. I studied until Grade 12 but failed my exam. I worked in a sweet factory in Bangalore to support my parents. I returned after a year, and did odd jobs in a brick factory and sometimes as a day labourer with my father. I did not go abroad because I did not have money and people were not willing to lend to us. It was only when I got a free recruitment job in Malaysia that I decided to migrate.&nbsp; Lalit: I came back from Qatar, got married and remigrated to Malaysia with Abinash. It has been 2.5 years and we work in the same factory and share a dorm room just as we did as kids. With the money we earned, we have bought land back in our village. We are returning to Malaysia after our vacation here. My wife put mehendi in my palms, and told me that I should remember her whenever I see it. I also gave her a silver chain I was wearing as memento. My wife said the mehendi will last about a month and will fade away, that is the most difficult part of being overseas — but after a few weeks the working life takes over and we get occupied with duty.  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20260411040436_431dc4b60a1a49977f5fea69b19aaf66b172e3b606573dd9673aa32c9eb9e2b2.jpg" data-media-id="editor_3" data-image-id="20260411040436_431dc4b60a1a49977f5fea69b19aaf66b172e3b606573dd9673aa32c9eb9e2b2" data-rendition-name="original" width="1787" height="1000" loading="lazy" alt="DD 90"> <figcaption>Abhinash's family seeing him off in 2023.</figcaption> </figure>   <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20260411040436_5a4faef596e76365fce3181fe8f3a215306755287cbe353c433e34758df0aaec.jpg" data-media-id="editor_4" data-image-id="20260411040436_5a4faef596e76365fce3181fe8f3a215306755287cbe353c433e34758df0aaec" data-rendition-name="original" width="1778" height="1000" loading="lazy" alt="DD 90"> <figcaption>Abhinash and Lalit getting welcomed by family after their return.</figcaption> </figure>  Abhinash: The election coincided with my vacation and I voted for the RSP in both ballots. They have already started building a road in our area, so there is hope. People in other parties were angry, but I told them my one vote would not have made a difference, they would have still lost. You can feel new energy in the village now, maybe things will change. We Musahars have always been discriminated against, even though our situation has improved. At least we do not have to worry about food anymore. It is not just my father who is the breadwinner. Now, I am also earning to support the family.&nbsp; Lalit: The whole point about migrating is to take care of my parents and make sure they are happy. They are my role models, and struggled all their lives for us. They invested in our studies so we would not have to live through what they did. They are happy that we are earning and supporting them. We bought land with the money saved in Malaysia. Now, as we go back, the next goal is to build a house. Then we will think about our future. When Abhinash and I were children, we thought we would be ठुलो मान्छे one day. I looked up to my teacher and wanted to be like him. But now that I am grown up, I do not have anyone I look up to. I just make my goals and achieve them.&nbsp;  <figure> <img src="https://publisher-publish.s3.eu-central-1.amazonaws.com/pb-nepalitimes/swp/asv65r/media/20260411040436_83af55ced9108a0604495df2f808e497f6ecb73d1772c30af72cef94a4f21915.jpg" data-media-id="editor_5" data-image-id="20260411040436_83af55ced9108a0604495df2f808e497f6ecb73d1772c30af72cef94a4f21915" data-rendition-name="original" width="1600" height="900" loading="lazy" alt="DD 90"> </figure>  Abhinash: We have our whole lives ahead of us, and it is our turn to support our parents. What is the point of anything if our family is not happy? I do not want my parents to have to depend on others for money. We Musahars have been historically mistreated. We are known to be too trusting, and we do as we are told. We grew up believing that we were underdogs because of our caste. People still treat us as untouchable, although less than before. We were invited to parties but made to sit separately; at friends’ houses, we were asked to remain outside. We accepted all this because that is way it always was. Even when it made us feel bad. My younger brother stopped going to parties altogether because he did not like that discriminatory treatment. The new generation is not like that thankfully.&nbsp; Lalit: I once ran away from a feast because the Musahar invitees had to eat last. High caste or low caste, we all have the same red blood. The young ones thankfully are not like that. We were invited to a wedding recently during this vacation from Malaysia, and all of us young boys sat and ate together. But if the elders had been around they would have asked Abhinash and me to sit separately from the others.&nbsp;

kudan

Telling the story of Buddha’s Lumbini

How to win friends and influence nations

The nation’s daughter

From Mahottari to Malaysia

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